<TITLE>17. Par 194-205</TITLE>L-194 I opened the door, and no nurse was there. I slipped down in the basement. That was before the hospital was fixed. Screens, no screens on the windows, hardly, and flies on her little eyes. Had a piece of mosquito bar, we call it, netting put over her face. I shooed the flies off; laid there. Her little eyes, she suffered so hard till they were crossing.

L-195   Then Satan moved up by the side of me there, and said, "Did you say He was a good God?"
I said, "Yeah, I said that."

L-196 "Did you say He was a healer? Well, why did your father die in your arms over there, and you calling, him a sinner, calling for his life? Why did your brother die in your other brother's arms, out there, and you standing in the pulpit preaching, a few weeks ago?" Said, "Then why didn't He answer you? You said He loved you and saved you."

L-197 He couldn't tell me there was no God, 'cause I already seen Him. But he was telling me He didn't care for me.

L-198 Said, "There lays your wife. Your babies will be there pretty soon. Your daddy is buried. Your brother is buried. And your wife is going to be buried now, tomorrow. And here is your other baby, dying. He's a good God? Huh? He's a healer?" Said, "You made a sap out of yourself!"

L-199   What did it do? From... it was working from the outside, now, to this first man.

L-200 Said, "Now look. You know, when you was a few years ago, about two or three years ago, before you accepted This, you was well thought of amongst the people. You lived a good, clean life. Any girl in the city, that wanted to go out, go out with you, 'cause they felt clean and decent." I could stand before any of them. I never insulted one, never said anything. She even act smart, I'd take her home. "And you were liked amongst the people. But what are you now? A religious fanatic."

L-201 "That's right. I was." See these things begin to move together? The outside, reasoning in the spirit, moving these things together. "That's right, Satan."
"And did you say He was a healer?"
"Yes. Hum. Yeah."

L-202 "And you begging and crying, and the people telling you it wasn't so, that you're all off the line. Your own church turned you out, for This. Your own Baptist church down there, put you out the door, for the very same cause.
"Yeah."

L-203 "Your daddy buried. Your brother buried. Your wife lying there, to be buried. Here is your baby, just about fifteen minutes longer and it'll be gone. And He's a healer? Your own flesh and blood; one word from Him would save the baby's life. 'He's a healer,' you said. The people tried to tell you. The preacher told you you was all messed up; you was all insane; you was become a religious fanatic. And you said He loved you. Could He love you?

L-204   "And how you cried for your daddy! How, night after night, you fasted, and when you... in daytime, when you'd have to pray, to get up a pole, to work. And when He let him die in your arms, a sinner.

L-205 "How your wife, what a fine woman she was, and how you loved her!"Billy's mother; many of you remember Hope. "What a fine girl she was! How happy you was, your little home over there; with about seven or eight dollars worth of furniture, what furniture you had, but yet you loved her; and you... and you loved one another. And you went and prayed for others; and, some mental emotion, they got up and walked away and said they were all right. But now your own wife; and there she is, dead, second day now, lying in the undertaker's establishment down yonder, Scott and Combs. He's a healer? Huh?


<A HREF="P18">Next Page</A>